Thoughts on Various Things

Silly Thoughts No. 1

I’m one of those weirdos who keeps a ‘think pad’ by her bed. I don’t know why it is, but, it seems that I get the most craziest, insightful, and inspirational ideas when I lay down to sleep. Last night, I was thinking about George Carlin and his book: Brain Droppings. In it, he wrote down some things that just popped in his head.
Weelll, here are some things that popped in my head: Enjoy!

PENCIL-PUSHER – a person who loves to push pencils over tables, desks, floors, etc.

TELEPHONE OPERATOR – doctor who surgically operates on sick telephones. ( I thought of this one when I was around 5 yrs. old, honestly!)

GHOSTWRITER – person (deceased) who writes books

PEA-SHOOTER – someone who shoots at peas. (c’mon, give peas a chance!)

TRAINING BRA – training a bra to do what exactly? Hmmm?

TANK TOP – top part of a tank (DUH!)

BAKING POWDER – talcum powder that you put in the oven at 350 degrees for 30 – 40 mins.

COTTON CANDY – candy you can turn into clothing. Laundering is NOT recommended!

ROSE BOWL PARADE – parade of varieties of bowls, ornamental and not so ornamental, with roses of different colors.

RUBBER STAMP – condom with the words “Rush Delivery” or ‘Fragile” or “Paid in Full”, etc. on the tip. Or maybe even a postage stamp: guaranteed overnight delivery!

Speaking of rubber: RUBBER CEMENT – special type of cement that makes people bounce when walking on it.

RUG BURN – rare type of skin disease that people who lay carpet can get.

ROAD RAGE – extreme aggravation the road get because too many people are driving on its back. (You don’t like it when people walk all over you, do you?)

TERRA BYTE – taking a HUGE bite out of the Earth.

ARROW/SPEAR HEAD – physical deformation. Can be corrected with surgery.

SALTPETER – a statue, made in salt, in the shape of Peter (pick your choice in Peters. I’m going for Peter Pan, myself)

BUNION – genetic hybrid of onions and hamburger buns.

GRAPESHOT – shooting at grapes

WAXING MOON – wax job on buttocks.

That’s all I got for now. Maybe I’ll have more later on.

Rebecca T.